Laura Bliss is a staff writer at CityLab, covering transportation and technology. She also authors MapLab, a biweekly newsletter about maps (subscribe here). Her work has appeared in the New York Times, The Atlantic, Los Angeles magazine, and beyond.
Every stop on the struggling rail system is named with a dystopic anagram.
Washington, D.C.’s Metro reached a low point in 2015, and those were the words of its acting General Manager in October. With a dismal (nay, fatal) safety record, terrible reliability, an ever-shuffling leadership deck, WMATA has seemed to be verging on the brink of total chaos.
It’s only fitting, then, that a cheeky Redditor designed the map WMATA deserves, where every rail stop on the flailing system is rendered as a dystopic anagram.
Dupont Circle becomes Lurid Concept; the much-anticipated Silver Line becomes the fiendish Livers Line. Consider taking the Dre Line (Red Line) out to RoboTwink (Twinbrook), but remember, you’ll have to backtrack into Diabolic Sitcom Turf (District of Columbia) if you want to make it to Golfer Nest (Forest Glen).
And yes, it gets political: Stops running to The Llama Loan (National Mall) include Erect Mentor (Metro Center), Faltering Leader (Federal Triangle), and This Mansion (Smithsonian).
The map’s creator, CharonX, says on Reddit that the project “was a labor of love, for both my fiance and DC itself.” And perhaps it’s something of a gift to WMATA’s new General Manager and Chief Executive Officer Paul J. Wiedefeld, who started his job at the end of November. Hey, Wiedefeld, take this Empty Mass (System Map) and make something functional.