Rogue River PD

“It is now green mulch,” say the cops.

Kudos to the world’s most honest dude in Rogue River, Oregon, who stumbled upon a portable toilet brimming with weed and did not immediately tow it to his backyard.

“A man walking his dog through Anna Classick Park [Wednesday] morning just before 9am, stopped to use the Porta-Potty next to the tennis courts… and found this,” writes the Rogue River Police Department. “Got marijuana? We Do!”

Detectives have yet to crack the mystery of the marijuana-filled crapper; it could’ve been a “pick up point to a disgruntled citizen making a statement about all the marijuana grows,” reports the AP. Another theory is somebody ripped off a legal operation and was hiding the loot. If that’s true, the thief picked a poor target: Facebook commenters are nearly unanimous in agreeing it’s some “shitty weed,” with “no buds” that would give you a “nasty headache.”

Whatever the reason, the stash—the largest-ever handled by the local cops—is gone now. Workers fed it through a municipal wood chipper, churning out a carpet of dank confetti. “It is now green mulch,” the police department writes. “Let’s just hope we don't get some suspicious looking green plants coming up through the ground next year at the city’s Public Works yard.”

But we’ll always have the memories:

Facebook commenter: “i think there is something tucked under his shirt!!!??? just sayin!!”
Rogue River PD

About the Author

Most Popular

  1. a photo of Los Angeles in 1962
    Transportation

    Mapping the Effects of the Great 1960s ‘Freeway Revolts’

    Urbanites who battled the construction of the Interstate Highway System in the 1960s saved some neighborhoods—but many highways did transform cities.

  2. A man and a woman shop at a modern kiosk by a beach in a vintage photo.
    Design

    Why Everyday Architecture Deserves Respect

    The places where we enact our daily lives are not grand design statements, yet they have an underrated charm and even nobility.

  3. a photo of a small fleet of electric Chevrolet Bolts cars.
    Transportation

    Should Electric Vehicle Drivers Pay Per Mile?

    Since EV drivers zip past gas taxes, they don’t contribute to the federal fund for road maintenance. A new working paper tries to determine whether plug-ins should pay up.

  4. A photo of anti-gentrification graffiti in Washington, D.C.
    Equity

    The Hidden Winners in Neighborhood Gentrification

    A new study claims the effects of neighborhood change on original lower-income residents are largely positive, despite fears of spiking rents and displacement.

  5.  New York City bus driver David Smith points out how to use the fare system to a passenger.
    Transportation

    There's a Bus Driver Shortage. And No Wonder.

    Why doesn't anyone want to drive the bus?

×